ME–SELFISH!?

Here’s how this week’s arts and culture column begins:

Recently someone with whom I’m walking the path of recovery chided me for being selfish. She thought I should offer myself for a certain kind of service that, at this point in my life, work, and Benedictine oblateship, I feel is beyond me.

“This isn’t just about you and your self-transformation,” she said. “It’s about passing what we have on to others.”

My first reaction was an inward, “Excuse me? My whole LIFE is a service!” The prayer, the books, the talks, the columns, the 15 years of blog posts, the endless correspondence, the travel, the countless “favors,” the hours spent in recovery circles, both giving and receiving. In fact, in the recent past, I’d faithfully shown up in service to her for an hour each week for more than a period of two years!

READ THE WHOLE PIECE HERE.

Comments

4 responses to “ME–SELFISH!?”

  1. tina Avatar

    hi heather
    yea you found a good point. we don’t even know how bad we are. and how we cringe when we be seen in a way, that shows our bad sides.
    st. Therese of lisieux said, you have to accept yourself when you are displeasing to yourself. I would say, you still have to love yourself. everybody is like that. to be human means to come from the earth. with worms.
    but the good thing is you still love yourself. and Jesus loves you too.
    as Ringo Starr in the news yesterday said: what really surprises me is, that the beat goes on!

    1. HEATHER KING Avatar
      HEATHER KING

      yes, totally, Tina! I actually didn’t quite adopt her view of me-I gave the thumbnail version of the situation–but at the same time I READILY acknowledge that I can be and often am monstrously selfish…so it was good practice not to defend myself (nor to point out her own recent derelictions of duty, and failure to apologize for them)…and then to really look at myself and my usual reactions in similar situations. Part of humility is admitting our faults, and another part is accepting that we are often misunderstood and unfairly maligned…with Christ, I can afford to be misunderstood, disliked, thought ill of…it still hurts but I don’t have to cling and obsess…so I condidered the whole situation major progress…

  2. Ingrid Avatar
    Ingrid

    Ouch! During Lent God reveals my din.

    1. HEATHER KING Avatar
      HEATHER KING

      Ha Ingrid, doees he ever!

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