Death has been much on everyone’s minds lately. Our own, possibly. The deaths of those who have fallen to COVID-19. Death in general.
Cemeteries were one of the first public places upon which restrictions were lifted. As of mid-May, the Archdiocese’s eleven Catholic cemeteries were open for visitation Monday through Saturday from 4 to 6, and Sundays from 8 to 6.
Meaning that you can now die, have a funeral and get buried in somewhat the same way as always.
That’s a comfort to many. And since the Communion of Saints—the spiritual union of the members of the Christian Church, living and the dead—is about as close to Mass as we can get now, last week I thought to visit Resurrection Cemetery in Rosemead.
I don’t know anyone who’s buried there, but that didn’t matter.
People often ask me to pray for them. Sometimes I’m too busy to do much else than include the person in my daily Rosary. But if at all possible, I like to go a teeny bit out of my way. I’ll walk the half hour to a nearby church and sit with Our Mother in the Mary grotto there, or pray the Stations of the Cross.
So that’s what I did at Resurrection Cemetery. Which if you’ve never been there, is a massive green space of rolling hills in the middle of the city, with views of the San Gabriel Valley and Mountains to the north. It has shade trees, and benches, and statues of saints. It has tucked- away sections and a mausoleum and a visitor’s center, and enough paved road so you can take an actual hour-long walk there if you’ve a mind to.
I walked and I prayed the Glorious Mysteries and I checked out the people. Thirstily, I checked out the people! I hadn’t been among that many human beings, in the flesh, for months.
A father, mother and little daughter had set up shop beneath an umbrella, ranchera music playing softly from their car radio. A man in work boots, skin weathered by the sun, tenderly clipped the grass around a gravestone. Women unwrapped snacks, corralled kids, smoothed blankets on the grass.
All around, people knelt by the graves of mothers, fathers, sons, daughters, uncles, aunts, grandmothers and grandfathers, friends.
Strolling along in the sun, pesky mask in place, I waved at anyone whose eye I could catch, or said “Hey,” and failing that, greeted everyone silently.
A group of teens, one with bright blue hair, streamed across the lawn with pots of pink azaleas. A couple of guys on lowrider motorcycles tooled in. I later saw them, helmets off, heads bowed over a stone, discussing how to place their several bouquets of flowers.
I thought back to the first Mass I’d attended as a sincere seeker, a worshiper.
It was a weekday noon Mass at St. Basil’s in Koreatown, back in the mid-90s. I’m used to Mass now. But to see people of all ages, races and demographics kneeling, before an altar, in the middle of a bustling city and the middle of the day, was a shocking sight. The intimacy was such that I almost thought I should turn my head.
The smell of incense and wax, the hushed silence, the shafts of filtered light, the bowed heads: all spoke of the intersection of time and eternity.
That sense of consecrated time and space eventually led me to convert.
That sense of consecrated time and space is what I’ve missed most during lockdown.
We’ve all suited up, showed up, soldiered on. “It’s not that bad,” we’ve told ourselves. “I can do this.” I, for one, have found the livestream Masses a lifeline. Daily I thank from my room the many people who go into putting them on, from the priest on down.
But the fact is a livestream Mass is not a real Mass, not by a long shot.
The fact is we are not made for masks, and shields, and gloves, and a life lived in front of a laptop.
We’re made for the smell of grass, and sharing food with friends, and kneeling on the consecrated ground beneath which a person we love has been buried.
We’re made for breathing the same air, and looking one another in the eye, and
spiritual union through the Real Body and Blood of Our Lord.
And it took walking through Resurrection Cemetery, among living, breathing people, for me to realize how incredibly deeply I have missed Him.
Before leaving, I got to use a public restroom for the first time in two months. That, too, was a thrill; a sign of normalcy. We’re together again. The world is getting back to the business of life.
“And after this, our exile, show unto us the blessed fruit of thy womb, Jesus.O clement, O loving, O sweet Virgin Mary.
Pray for us O Holy Mother of God,
That we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.”
Thank you!
Thanks! I needed that!
And now, as of Thursday and Friday, I have been back to the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. Deep balm to my buffeted soul…Thanks, Ingrid and LIsa, so glad you liked it.
I LOVED your piece on Resurrection Cemetery, although now, after saying that I am sorry that this is the Catholic Cemetery you chose to cover. My people are major “land owners” there – family, in-laws, cousins by the dozens, and friends. I have written to two Archbishops complaining about the “perpetual care” that is not happening. Like yourself, I find solace in the knowledge that my loved ones are close, and truly “in a better place” but I can not recommend Resurrection as a Cemetery to inter your loved ones.
Oh dear, K., I’m so sorry the Archdiocese is dropping the ball on perpetual care at Resurrection…I of course knew nothing of the politics of the place and wrote solely as a thirster-after communion with my brothers and sisters…also Resurrection was the closest Catholic cemetery to my apt in Pasadena. Anyway, the spirit there was lovely–and I’m not kidding, getting to use the ladies’ room there was one of the highlights of my day. May your loved ones rest in peace….