Here’s how this week’s arts and culture column (which in fact is not in defense but rather a critique of) begins:
Let me say up front that I am not one of these people who feels oppressed, discriminated against and marginalized by the mere fact and station of another’s existence.
That you’re a man and I’m a woman doesn’t mean I feel called to mope about the world feeling victimized. That you like blue doesn’t make me jump to the conclusion that you hate me because I like green.
Because we have a day celebrating romantic love doesn’t make me feel I need a corresponding day to call attention to the value of my own station in life, which happens to be an unmarried, childless, “contemplative laywoman” as “Magnificat Magazine” (for whom I also write) sort of thrillingly puts it.
I especially don’t need such a day with the acronym SAD: Singles Awareness Day.
Who in God’s name came up with such a notion? And gave it such an unfortunate name!
In this culture God forbid anyone should feel a moment of existential exile, depression, sadness, loneliness, feeling apart from, different than, left behind or left out—in other words, God forbid anyone should feel a moment of the admittedly shocking reality of the human condition.
I’ve felt all those things as a single person, but I felt them as well, maybe more so, during the 14 years I was married. I’m not saying twenty years of being single, and following the teachings of the Church, have been a picnic.
But what is? Certainly not marriage. St. Paul himself advised that if you’re unmarried—stay that way. You won’t be torn between family obligations and will be able to devote yourself single-mindedly and single-heartedly to God.